Fatty

Read this top to bottom. Pretend it's two pages of a book or something I dont know.. You'll get it.

So more often than not, when I try to carefully place my cat's water dish down, he headbutts it causing water to slosh onto not only him, but the new hardwood floor. Why? Because he's an asshole. Why is he an asshole? because he's a fucking cat! And yes, he really does get ice in his water.. and water from the fridge. He's spoiled because I love him. What a jerk.